Cynthia is a bright, stylin’ young woman who called in a panic from London. She was considering moving there and had gone to look up old friends and seek job opportunities. Friends wanted her to stay, but no business leads were calling her back.
As we talked, it bacame clear that she was having a crisis of confidence. She felt that, when she left messages, she was supplicating, and so she felt one-down. She’d also been told not to be pushy, so putting herself out there triggered her old fears of being rejected. She was sure she knew that they were thinking that she was a loser. She completely lost sight of her skills and training. So she emitted a vibe of lack of worth and confidence.
The first thing we needed to do is to reconnect her with herself. We did a grounding exercise over the phone, which brought her back to a kinesthetic experience of her substance – her body in the present. That is always the best place to go when the thoughts in your head are giving you trouble! Grounding brings you back to your bottomline – what’s real about you in the present.
Then we worked on her confidence. We worked through her dominant belief of unworthiness. Then I gave her homework: to list what she had to offer – all her strengths and experience.
Then I showed her that she was offering a service to the businesses she called. They didn’t have to look for a trend-watcher/writer/designer. She was making it easy for them to find what their business needed.
Cynthia finished the session feeling settled and optimistic. Making contacts while grounded and aware of her value will make all the difference in her job hunt. And believing that she is worthy will make her worklife more successful. She’ll take better care of herself, not burn herself out trying to get people’s approval, but pacing herself and valuing her talent.